Caitlin Howden

“Why? What hap­pened? What did I do?” I put away my cell phone, which I was using for one of my many fake phone calls I have to look less awk­ward in my own body. “Did I block any­one in? You’re not going to make me to a hand­stand, are you?”

SM: How did you end up in Van­cou­ver? / What do you miss about Montreal?

CH: I spent 9 years in Toronto and I fell in love with it. I a very proud Mon­treal native, because it makes me feel just a bit cooler. I go back to both cities quite often. But I had never been to Van­cou­ver. Every­one was talk­ing about how boom­ing the film and TV scene was out here. In Toronto, there are com­mer­cials and Cana­dian TV a-plenty, so I thought I would try my hand out here. Turns out as soon as I moved out here things just dried up. The US started offer­ing the same tax cred­its that made Van­cou­ver so allur­ing to US work. So here I am! Ah, but don’t feel so bad for me. Come on, stop cry­ing. There is a happy end­ing, I have also fallen in love with Van­cou­ver. I love my Cana­dian cities like I love my men; hard to reach and in threes. (improv joke)

SM: What was your first stage performance?

CH: I played Aun­tie Em in the Wiz­ard of Oz in grade 3. I thought I was play­ing Dorothy, because that was what my brain heard. Then we showed up for first day of rehearsal and I cried.

SM: What do you like about doing comedy?

CM: We make peo­ple laugh. And laugh­ter is good for you. And it’s what I’m good at. Some peo­ple are good at hav­ing sta­bil­ity, going for reg­u­lar check ups, pay­ing their taxes, or sleep­ing at night with­out full on panic attacks.  It takes all kinds, right?

SM: What do you dis­like about it?

CH: Please refer to what other peo­ple are good at in pre­vi­ous question.

SM: What was the worst show you’ve ever done?

CH: Prob­a­bly the one where I fell off the stage while wear­ing a dress into a table hold­ing three mar­gar­i­tas, a pitcher of beer, and a group of grown peo­ple who made a face I’ll never for­get. They reacted to me the same way I would react to an open-mouthed shark falling on my face.

I had to do the rest of the 2 hour show with bloody knees, smelling of beer, and the lady-hose I was wear­ing to con­ceal my “less than a man, more than I’d like” leg hair was so torn up I went bare-legged and fancy-free. I could hear peo­ple in the front row whis­per “Oh no, the blood is get­ting caught in her leg hair”. That was a shit night.

SM: Where do you get your inspirations?

CH: I like to stand naked in front of the mir­ror a lot. It’s usu­ally my milky white skin that does the trick regard­ing inspiration.

SM: What do you like best: the­atre, improv or standup?

CH: Well, The­atre is reaaaal­l­l­l­l­lly cute, and Improv did the fun­ni­est thing last night. Stand Up and I had a one-night stand back in 2003, so… I like them all, but Improv is the one pay­ing my bills right now… .IMPROV! I CHOOSE IMPROV!

SM: What is the fun­ni­est thing you have ever seen?

CH: In this order:

• This!
• Then this!
• Can’t for­get this one.
• Also, these videos.

See Caitlin this Thurs­day at the Cobalt! $10 gets you a one-year sub­scrip­tion, the finest com­edy in Van­cou­ver, and an all-night dance party.

Sad Com­edy: Valen­tine Edition

The Cobalt (917 Main St)

Thurs­day, Feb­ru­ary 9th, 2012

Doors at 8:00PM, show at 9:00PM

Cover $10 (includes subscription)

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