Sell Out, A Series: 5 Questions with Em Haine
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Sell Out is a series by interdisciplinary artist Angela Fama (she/they), who co-creates conversations with individual artists across Vancouver. Questioning ideas of artistry, identity, “day jobs,” and how they intertwine, Fama settles in with each artist (at a local café of their choice) and asks the same series of questions. With one roll of medium format film, Fama captures portraits of the artist after their conversations.
Em Haine (all pronouns) is a Canadian actor. Follow them on Instagram @emhaine
Location: Nelson the Seagull
What do you make/create?
Acting for film and television is how I keep the lights on in my flat. Currently, I’m a series regular on SyFy’s Reginald the Vampire and last year I played the lead in two feature films. One was a rom-com called Why Can’t My Life Be A Rom-Com? for E! channel. The second was a queer indie film written and directed by Sandi Somers, titled Hailey Rose. I played Hailey. That’s doing the festival circuit now. We had our Canadian debut at Calgary International Film Festival, and our American debut at Cinequest in San Jose, California—so stoked!
As a kid, community musical theatre was one of the few places that could wield my wild energy and big emotions. I have a core memory of that first live performance on stage, in a theatre, in front of all our parents and extended families, I was probably five or so – and having the audience react to something I did, making them laugh… it imprinted on me. It’s intimate, the connection between performer and audience.
I didn’t stay in theatre, puberty hit hard, but a seed was planted. So even though my life took some wild detours, it was always something I held as precious. A dream I kept to myself for years. The perceived weight of someone saying in a disparaging way: “Oh you? You want to be an actor?” felt crushing. So I kept it a secret between me and my childhood BFF. We plotted and schemed this whole career during late night phone calls in our respective teenage bedrooms – she was going to be my cool mysterious “assistant” that stood in the back of all my press photos with sunglasses on, who nobody could name (cause she doesn’t like the attention) but was always beside me, us coming up together… We dreamed big! When I came back to acting as an adult, I really had no idea what it even was, but I’d held onto those glimmering feelings from when I was young.
Luckily, I went for it. After getting my GED I bought a one way ticket to London, UK, worked in a pub and found this Meisner program. It was a small West End studio of artists nerding out on the human condition. We analyzed relationships, circumstances and story in ways I’d always been curious of but didn’t yet have the outlet, channel, or environment for. They encouraged us to be students of life. It hit me in a spiritual way too. We are all connected like individual flowers in a field of interconnecting roots. That school, The Actors Temple, put me on a trajectory of wanting to ask more questions and meet more strangers. Like, wanting to really be in life. Present for it. I think that’s what makes a really beautiful performer, or artist of any kind: someone with roads in their rear view, good camp fire stories, battle scars, and a hall of fame of death bed memories messy and colourful enough to send you into the next dimension with.
What do you do to support that?
When I committed to acting, about 10 years ago now, I basically had to ask myself if I really wanted it. You hear the term “struggling artist” and see your heroes in the industry winning, but behind the curtain that “overnight success” is often ten, sometimes twenty plus years in the making. So ya I’ve had every type of random Craigslist job. Acting has this gambler's spirit to it… Gotta play to win! I believe there’s room enough for everyone to shine. And I’m devoted to fostering a fulfilling and love filled life outside of industry wins.
I started in the industry by doing free work. Unpaid indies, low budget student films, while working mostly as a server (auditions are all unpaid btw). Now a decade in (auditions are still unpaid) I’m lucky to say that acting’s my main gig! I’ve got a growing repertoire of campfire stories and best friends that all care intensely and live authentically. I’m so grateful to be here. It’s a dream come true and it’s more no’s than I’d ever imagined possible. If one ‘no’ really gets me down, I wallow for a bit, perhaps commiserate with dramatic flair, then find the lesson and get back in the saddle. I’m all in honey!
To support that drive my focus is on my rituals. That looks like yoga, Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, seeing my therapist, and somatically caring for my body – which may sound corny, but it’s my instrument, and if I want to stand and emote for a 16 hour day, I have to be physically/mentally/spiritually fit enough to do that. What people see on TV, those few minutes onscreen, we’re shooting a whole day to get those few minutes, and talking to a billion different departments of people, all coming together to make movie magic happen.
Describe something about how your art practice and your “day job” interact.
My day job varies drastically whether I’m on or off set. When you book a gig, production puts you on hold for a block of days to months depending on the role and the shooting schedule. At that time I’m rereading the script(s), prepping the material and seeking reference materials. Then they call you to set for your character's shoot days. Those days are scheduled down to the minute. Like your call time could be 4:27am. Sign in, sign out, copy that, 10-1 means you're going pee. It’s militant. Zero to one hundred, all systems go. Off set it’s the wild wild west. Auditions are constant but the unstructured time can get loopy. Rabbit holes of artist interviews, biographies, stand up specials. Binge consumption of art. Playing guitar. Journaling. Touching grass. Following my muse and doing something good for the plot.
What’s a challenge you’re facing, or have faced, in relation to this and/or what’s a benefit?
Finding discipline in between gigs is an ever evolving process. The desire to be seen and simultaneously want to hide is complex. And ya sometimes the no’s knock you down, but it’s brought me to the realization that what’s meant for you will find you; you don’t have to chase, you can just be. It’s humbling.
Have you made, or created, anything that was inspired by something from your day job? Please describe.
Oh ya some of those random jobs make for great material. Like for one very brief moment I was hired as a shuttle driver for a large black tie event. Was it a wedding? Who knows. Anyway I hit a parking meter in front of my boss. The whole passenger side door was dented. I was not asked back. That’s a pretty decent cold open for a comedy series right? Lol.
Or like the other night I was out walking my dog, Igg, her last walk before bed and you know, I live in an apartment, it’s late at night, it’s cold, I don’t want to so I was kind of in a mood. We’re walking through the city, we stop at a corner, and an ambulance drives by, sirens blaring. Less than a handful of times Iggy’s howled at an ambulance. But on the off chance she does, I look at my dog like, “are we doing this?” then I howl, to get her to howl. She starts howling. I looked over beside me, and three strangers on the street corner start howling. We all howled together. At the ambulance, under the moon. Call me cheesy but to me that’s art.
Angela Fama (she/they) is an interdisciplinary artist, creator of the Death Conversation Game, photographer, and musician of mixed european descent currently living and working on the unceded traditional and ancestral territories of the Coast Salish xʷməθkwəy̓əm, Skwxwú7mesh and Səl̓ílwətaʔ/Selilwitulh Nations.
Follow them at IG @angelafama IG @deathconversationgame or on their website www.angelafama.com
